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We have elevated England's former number ten to Number Ten this weekend, running on a pledge not to stop all the boats, just the superyachts. It's clearly at times like this that you just have to ask yourself "what - and I cannot stress this enough - the f_ck?"; yes, the world is a mad and dangerous place, and getting progressively worse, but perhaps it's our own fault for leaving them all unsupervised. Have a lovely weekend, and keep on keepin' on...