The Red Molotov T-Shirts Blog

Blessed are the Cheesemakers: New T-Shirts and Organic Cotton Polos

May 20th, 2010

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As you may have noticed, it has been nearly a month and we have not brought you any new t-shirt designs. Well, fear not, for we have a plethora of brand new cerebrally challenging clothing newly on the shelves for you as of today. Have a look below for our new t-shirt designs which cover such diverse themes as retro television, retro politics, retro idolatry, retro philosophy and George Monbiot. We’ve caved in to popular demand and released two Malcolm Tucker t-shirt designs and a Voltaire t-shirt.

We are also delighted to announce that we are now stocking five different colours of environmentally friendly 100% organic cotton polo shirts made by Okarma. We are really pleased with the feel and quality of these polos, as well as the ethical nature of their production. They are are made from 100% SKAL/Control Union Certified organic cotton pique. In addition they are certified GM Free, Oeko-Tex Certified and ethically produced using a transparent supply chain and bio-degradable packaging. They are made from 225g/sqm heavyweight pique cotton. At present we’ve only got a couple of designs available, but we are planning on bringing out many more in the near future so please let us know what designs you would like to see us make and we’ll try to do it.

Call My Bluff T-Shirt
	Do-do, do-do, do, do-do-do-do…. With Robert Robertson as the referee and Frank Muir and Patrick Campbell captaining. Now to concoct a spurious definition for the word “scolecophagous”
Old Labour T-Shirt
	Show your true colours with this old-school parody on the New Labour logo. Old Labour: True Labour.
Blessed Are The Cheesemakers T-Shirt
	“I think it was ‘Blessed are the cheesemakers’.” “What’s so special about the cheesemakers?” “Well, really it’s not meant to be taken literally; it refers to any manufacturers of dairy products.”
Big Kahuna Burger T-Shirt
	Pulp Fiction. The scene: Jules and Vincent have just walked in on breakfast - Jules: “Looks like me an Vincent caught you boys at breakfast. Sorry about that. Whatcha havin’?” Brett: “Hamburgers.” Jules: “Hamburgers! The cornerstone of any nutritious breakfast. What kind of hamburgers?” Brett: “Ch-cheeseburgers.” Jules: “No, no no, where’d you get ‘em? McDonalds? Wendy’s? Jack in the Box? Where?” Brett: “Big Kahuna Burger.” Jules: “Big Kahuna Burger. That’s that Hawaiian burger joint. I hear they got some tasty burgers. I ain’t never had one myself. How are they?” Brett: “They’re good.” Jules: “Mind if I try one of yours? This is yours here, right?” [Picks up burger and takes a bite] “Mmm-mmmm. That is a tasty burger.”
What Are We Fighting For? T-Shirt
	In the war fought in order to establish democracy and peace, two golden arches of fire launched from twin missile silos light the sky. One asks the other: “Remind me what we’re fighting for again?”
Tucker’s Law T-Shirt
	Sadly not yet available on a tea-towel, the wisdom of Malcolm Tucker: “If some c— can f— something up, that c— will pick the worst possible time to f—ing f— it up because that c—’s a c—”. Available censored or in full uncensored version.
Voltaire “Right and Wrong” Quote T-Shirt
	“It is dangerous to be right in matters on which the established authorities are wrong”. François-Marie Arouet, better known as Voltaire, espouses the questioning of authority.
Plato “Politics” Quote T-Shirt
	Plato encourages the masses to engage with the democratic process: “He who refuses to be involved in politics must endure being ruled by inferior people”
Gregg Wallace T-Shirt
	Masterchef’s own self-styled “ingredients expert” with what can only be his catchphrase: “Yummy!”
Malcolm Tucker “Sweaty Balls” Quote T-Shirt
	The best director of communications that Number 10 has never had lets rip at an obese American: “Kiss my sweaty balls, you fat f—”
Oscar Wilde “Drinking Classes” Quote T-Shirt
	“Work is the curse of the drinking classes”. The great Oscar Wilde slums it with the rest of us.
Aldous Huxley “Facts” Quote T-Shirt
	“Facts do no cease to exist because they are ignored” – Aldous Huxley on religion, science, politics….
George Monbiot T-Shirt
	The great George Monbiot: writer, journalist, environmentalist, political activist and all-round hero of ours.
Mark Twain “Schooling” Quote T-Shirt
	The value of a good school vs the value of a good education, as evidenced as far back as the 19th century by Mark Twain: “I have never let my schooling interfere with my education”.

New T-Shirt Colours, New T-Shirts Books T-Shirts, Comedy T-Shirts, Ethical T-Shirts, Film T-Shirts, Geek T-Shirts, New T-Shirt Colours, Politics T-Shirts, Retro T-Shirts, TV Programmes T-Shirts

Domestic Extremist: Last Chirstmas Order Dates and New T-Shirts

November 18th, 2009

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Glance below to see twelve new and quite frankly splendid t-shirt designs now available for you to purchase from your favourite online t-shirt emporium. Whether you happen to be a protester, miner, pub rocker, geek, Vogon or just plain bearded we’re sure you’ll find something that you’ll like (and even if not, we’ve got 500 other designs waiting for you to pick from!).

Last Order Dates for Pre- Christmas Guaranteed Delivery

Sorry to say it, but the winter solstice is soon to be upon us. And with it we are well aware that getting your t-shirts delivered in plenty of time for the purposes of some festive generosity is a priority. Therefore, should you require your favourite t-shirts to be with you in time for unwrapping on Christmas day, then these are the final order dates to bear in mind:

For delivery within the UK you can order any time up to and including Monday 21 December if you use the Special Delivery surcharge (£4.99 per order, no matter how many items you buy).
For normal delivery within the UK please make sure that you order on or before Friday 18 December.
For delivery to Europe, the USA, Canada and Japan you must order on or before Tuesday 8 December if you require delivery before Christmas.
For the rest or the world we can only guarantee pre-Christmas delivery for orders placed on or before Wednesday 2 December.

The above dates are based on the last postage dates provided by Royal Mail. We will ensure that all orders placed on or before the above dates are sent out in time to meet the last posting requirements, however we do still recommend that you order as early as possible to absolutely ensure that no unforeseen circumstances affect delivery.

We’d like to wish all our supporters and friends a very happy Christmas, Hanukkah, Wintermas, Kwanzaa, Hogmanay, Jul or whatever else it is that you may celebrate at this time of year.

Vogon Constructor Fleet T-Shirt

Essential wear for any aspiring bureaucratically-minded, bad-tempered, officious, callous and poetry-loving, intergalactic construction worker. This t-shirt design looks especially fetching in traditional Vogon yellow.

Domestic Extremist T-Shirt

A response to the British police re-branding of legitimate protest as “domestic extremism” in order to justify the increasingly draconian measures to clamp down on demonstrators. As highlighted by the Guardian newspaper in October 2009.

Valerie and John and Peter and Shep T-Shirt

The line-up from the “Golden Age” of BBC Children’s television. Valerie Singleton, John Noakes, Peter Purves and, of course, Shep: Blue Peter circa 1971. TV heaven.

British Coal T-Shirt

The logo of the, now defunct, British Coal Corporation. Formed as the National Coal Board following nationalisation after the Second World War, this was the last logo of the nationalised British Coal industry before privatisation in the 1990s.

Fish, Chips and Mushy Peas T-Shirt

Fuel of Great Britain. A parody of the famous “Keep Calm and Carry On” wartime propaganda poster, only espousing the benefits of North Atlantic cod, chopped, fried potatoes and rehydrated dried marrowfat peas combined with E102 and E133.

The Game Of Life Glider T-Shirt

The four iterations of a glider in John Conway’s “Game of Life” cellular automaton. Discovered by Richard K. Guy in 1970, the glider is the smallest spaceship, and the one most commonly produced in a Game of Life universe.

I Prefer Their Old Stuff T-Shirt

“Well, they’re OK I suppose. I thought their third album was rubbish though. To be honest I prefer their old stuff…”

Domestic Extremist Protester T-Shirt

The transformation of respectable middle-aged lady to potential threat to national security and infrastructure by dint of her taking up a placard and attending a peaceful demonstration. Commonly labelled as a “Domestic Extremist” by the British police.

Love Me, Love My Beard T-Shirt

A plea on behalf of all those who allow their facial follicles to do as nature intended. Inspired by and dedicated to the fine gentlemen of the British Beard Club – love me, love my beard.

British Steel T-Shirt

The logo of British Steel, former standard bearer for the most famous and best steel production in the world. Now defunct.

Have You Got Any Quo? T-Shirt

Forget your Led Zep or your Procul Harum, Mr DJ. Give me three of the finest sweet, sweet chords to rock out to. Amen.

Simon and Sarah and Peter and Goldie T-Shirt

Simon Groom, Sarah Greene, Peter Duncan and the ever faithful Goldie the dog. The ultimate Blue Peter line-up for anyone who was a child in the early 80s.

Last Christmas Order Dates, New T-Shirts Books T-Shirts, Film T-Shirts, Geek T-Shirts, Music T-Shirts, Politics T-Shirts, Retro T-Shirts, TV Programmes T-Shirts

Keep Calm And Carry On; New T-Shirts Out Now

October 1st, 2009

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We have been asked for Gonzo Fist t-shirts by you, our esteemed supporters, and we have delivered them to you today. We have been asked to produce Keep Calm and Carry On t-shirts too and lo, they are now available. People have suggested a Dench t-shirt in honour of Dame Judi and it has been done. Tolpuddle Martyrs, Peter Mandelson, Ian Brown, all have come in as requests for sartorial excellence at one time or another and all are now available from our website. One of our friends has even bugged us for months to produce a “Cosh the Driver” t-shirt in tribute to the soon-to-be-late-lamented Mr R. Biggs (until recently of Rio de Janeiro, now residing somewhere at Her Majesty’s pleasure). Has anyone ever asked us to make a t-shirt featuring a cute kitty cat firing deadly laser beams from its eyes at an unsuspecting mouse though? No. We have to confess one of our designers came up with that one all by herself.

Keep Calm And Carry On T-Shirt

The most British of motivational posters, originally designed to keep the spirits up and help maintain a stiff upper lip in the face of a Nazi invasion. Much parodied, we present it here in its original form, urging the nation to simply “Keep Calm and Carry On”.

Gonzo Fist T-Shirt

Based on a design used by the Hunter S Thompson’s campaign to be elected Sheriff of Aspen, Colorado. The two thumbed, clenched fist is depicted clutching a Peyote bud and includes the slogan “buy the ticket, take the ride” in homage to Thompson’s Fear And Loathing in Las Vegas.

Cat With Laser Beam Eyes T-Shirt

Here little mousey…. bzzzzzztttttt. Tiddles zaps the rodent armed with nothing but his deadly stare.

Pessimist T-Shirt

Includes the image of a half-empty glass for anyone who favours pessimism.

Pavlov’s Dog T-Shirt

Poor Pavlov’s dog; there he is minding his own business when that bloody bell makes him dribble all over his chin one again. Feed Pavlov’s Dog: Put an end to all this misery and give him some lovely doggy treats.

Tolpuddle Martyrs T-Shirt

The Tolpuddle Martyrs were the forefathers of the modern Trades Union movement. The lines here were written by George Loveless shortly before they were transported to Australia for swearing a secret oath as members of the Friendly Society of Agricultural Labourers: “God is our guide! From field, from wave, From plough, from anvil, and from loom; We come, our country’s rights to save, And speak a tyrant faction’s doom: We raise the watch-word liberty; We will, we will, we will be free!”

To Save Time Assume I Know Everything T-Shirt

It’s only misplaced arrogance if it is actually misplaced. Make 100% sure that the world is aware of your genius.

Nelson Mandela T-Shirt

Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela, former freedom fighter, political prisoner and South African President. In this t-shirt design he is accompanied by a quote attributed to him that sums up his philosophy on the movement for change in Africa: “It always seems impossible, until it’s done”.

Optimist T-Shirt

Incorporating a picture of a half-full glass for all those of an optimistic persuasion.

Dench T-Shirt

Dame Judi Dench: one of Britain’s best loved actors be she Queen Vic, Queen Liz, Iris Murdoch, Mrs. Laura Henderson or the head of the British Secret Service.

Mandy T-Shirt

The man the Labour Party may yet come to love. One of the most formidable political operators of the last twenty years – and that’s just how his many enemies describe him! One Peter “Mandy” Mandelson.

Don’t Be Such A Square T-Shirt

“Hey, you… Don’t be such a…” (makes shape of a square with forefingers a la Uma Thurman in Pulp Fiction).

King Monkey T-Shirt

This t-shirt design depicts Ian Brown, lead singer of the Stone Roses and latterly solo artist of much repute, in typically psychedelic style.

Ronnie Biggs: Cosh The Driver T-Shirt

The original title for the Sex Pistols collaboration with one of the most famous of South American exiles, one Ronnie Biggs. Showing an image of the Great Train Robber himself breaking out of his handcuffs.

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“I’m ‘Avin’ Hoops” – New T-Shirts and 3-for-2 Sale on all RedMolotov T-Shirt Designs

August 5th, 2009

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RedMolotov’s 3-for 2 SALE NOW ON!

Yes, drag your disbelieving selves off the floor! You can now order and pay for two incredibly cool, stylish and clever t-shirt designs from your favourite online emporium and get a third one absolutely FREE. What’s more, order any number of items from our website over three – four, seven, twenty-six or three hundred and seventy four if you like – and we’ll give you a whopping 33.3% off your total bill no matter how many you order (even if is not an exact multiple of three!). How generous are we? Very, that’s the answer you’re looking for.

You don’t need to use a discount code or anything complicated like that, just add the items required to your basket (t-shirts, hoodies, bags – whatever you like) and as long as there is three or more things being bought we’ll automatically deduct 33.3% from your total.

Our three for two offer is running throughout August, or until such a moment as we can no longer afford our exquisite generosity, so don’t delay: order today!

Sorry, our Sale is now finished!

New T-Shirt Designs This Week from RedMolotov.com

In addition to the great offer above, look below for the new designs that have just appeared on our site. Whether you need to repair your X-Wing starfighter or your hero is more in the mold of DCI Gene Hunt than Jabba The Hutt then we’ve (probably) got just the ting for you (and if not, we’re sure some of your friends would appreciate a gift for summer!)

Keep up to date with all the awesomeness happening at RedMolotov Towers by becoming our virtual web 2.0 friends using a variety of social networking goodness! Click on one of the icons below to start cyber-stalking us:

X-Wing Owners’ Manual T-Shirt

The Haynes style manual for stripping down and rebuilding your standard Rebel Alliance starfighter. Currently lacking instructions on repair of integrated R2 unit.

Mix Tape T-Shirt

Nine original, retro, multicoloured 1980s purveyors of mixtape magic.

TIE Fighter Owners’ Manual T-Shirt

Help with repairing your Imperial Starfighter should is become damaged through accident, asteroid impact or during combat. In the style of the classic Haynes manual.

Come To The Dark Side, We Have Cookies T-Shirt

Darth Vader comes up with a tempting offer. Can Skywalker resist?

“I’m Having Hoops” Life On Mars T-Shirt

“It’s 1973, almost dinner time. I’m ‘avin’ hoops”. DCI Gene Hunt of Manchester and Salford Police with his thoroughly modern take on community policing.

Make Tea Not War T-Shirt

Pacifist principles give rise to a fine brew instead of all that nasty slaughter. Put the kettle on. Sounds good to us.

Feminists Are Cute T-Shirt

Pink and covered with girly flowers. Because intelligent, free thinking women are just so adorable!

Sorry, Not In Service T-Shirt

The original London Routemaster bus on a road to nowhere. Number Zero, “Sorry, Not In Service”.

Second Verse, Same As The First T-Shirt

Rock out with the Ramones: Jackie is a punk, Judy is a runt; they both went down to Berlin, joined the Ice Capades; and oh, I don’t know why oh, I don’t know why; perhaps they’ll die, oh yeah perhaps they’ll die, oh yeah.

Dorothy Parker “Girls Who Wear Glasses” T-Shirt

“Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses” – Dorothy Parker, the great American author, poet and wit, on the tribulations of the ocularly challenged.

Big Cat Face T-Shirt

Scare mousey by sporting one huge feline head.

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Some People Never Go Crazy…

July 6th, 2009

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New T-Shirt Designs This Week from RedMolotov.com

This week’s new t-shirt designs are a historical lot. We’ve got a dedication to a historic American author and poet in Charles Bukowski, a much requested design based on the historic TV show the Frost Report’s “Class” sketch, a tribute to that other historic hero of the proletariat;Leon Trotsky, the logo of a historic British manufacturing institution (now defunct), t-shirts celebrating two historic TV shows and, finally, your opportunity to celebrate the second summer of love, 20 years after the event.

Charles Bukowski T-Shirt

“Some people never go crazy, What truly horrible lives they must live”. Charles Bukowski: “laureate of American lowlife”, author and poet (1920-1994).

Leon Trotsky “Trot” T-Shirt

A design for all those proletarian internationalists; advocates of a democratic dictatorship of the proletariat. Show your Trotskyist colours.

The Frost Report T-Shirt

John Cleese, Ronnie Barker and Ronnie Corbett in the all-time classic Frost Report sketch on the class divide:

Cleese: I look down on him because I am upper-class.

Barker: I look up to him because he is upper-class; but I look down on him because he is lower-class. I am middle-class.

Corbett: I know my place. I look up to them both. But I don’t look up to him as much as I look up to him, because he has got innate breeding.

Cleese: I have got innate breeding, but I have not got any money. So sometimes I look up to him.

Barker: I still look up to him because although I have money, I am vulgar. But I am not as vulgar as him so I still look down on him.

Corbett: I know my place. I look up to them both; but while I am poor, I am industrious, honest and trustworthy. Had I the inclination, I could look down on them. But I don’t.

Barker: We all know our place, but what do we get out of it?

Cleese: I get a feeling of superiority over them.

Barker: I get a feeling of inferiority from him, but a feeling of superiority over him.

Corbett: I get a pain in the back of my neck.

Thomas Paine “Religion” T-Shirt

“My country is the world, my religion to do good”, a quote from Thomas Paine: radical, revolutionary, Deist and founding father.

British Leyland T-Shirt

Great British manufacturing company (1968-1986), the last vestiges of which died with the demise of LDV Limited in 2009. R.I.P.

Albert Einstein “Genius” Quote T-Shirt

Demonstrate your aptitude for problem prevention; “Intellectuals solve problems; geniuses prevent them”, quoted by the great Dr. Albert Einstein.

Grange Hill Sausage T-Shirt

Iconic image from the opening credits of BBC Children’s TV classic Grange Hill. The forked sausage entering stage left in the refectory just prior to the fight breaking out near the football pitch.

Destroy Capitalism T-Shirt

Drawing on the influence of the branding of that symbol of global capitalism, Coca-Cola. Symbolism juxtaposed with message.

A-Team Van T-Shirt

Featuring a black and metallic grey GMC Vandura van as used in the hit 80s TV show. “In 1972, a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn’t commit. These men promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire… The A-Team.”

Acid House Smiley T-Shirt

Grab your whistle and party like it’s 1989 once more with the classic Acid House smiley design. Altogether now: “Acieeeeeeeed”…

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Blessed are the Cheesemakers: New T-Shirts and Organic Cotton Polos

Call My Bluff T-Shirt

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Blessed Are The Cheesemakers T-Shirt

Big Kahuna Burger T-Shirt

What Are We Fighting For? T-Shirt

Tucker’s Law T-Shirt

Voltaire “Right and Wrong” Quote T-Shirt

Plato “Politics” Quote T-Shirt

Gregg Wallace T-Shirt

Malcolm Tucker “Sweaty Balls” Quote T-Shirt

Oscar Wilde “Drinking Classes” Quote T-Shirt

Aldous Huxley “Facts” Quote T-Shirt

George Monbiot T-Shirt

Mark Twain “Schooling” Quote T-Shirt

Domestic Extremist: Last Chirstmas Order Dates and New T-Shirts

Keep Calm And Carry On; New T-Shirts Out Now

“I’m ‘Avin’ Hoops” – New T-Shirts and 3-for-2 Sale on all RedMolotov T-Shirt Designs

Some People Never Go Crazy…

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The Red Molotov T-Shirts Blog

Archive

Blessed are the Cheesemakers: New T-Shirts and Organic Cotton Polos

Call My Bluff T-Shirt

Old Labour T-Shirt

Blessed Are The Cheesemakers T-Shirt

Big Kahuna Burger T-Shirt

What Are We Fighting For? T-Shirt

Tucker’s Law T-Shirt

Voltaire “Right and Wrong” Quote T-Shirt

Plato “Politics” Quote T-Shirt

Gregg Wallace T-Shirt

Malcolm Tucker “Sweaty Balls” Quote T-Shirt

Oscar Wilde “Drinking Classes” Quote T-Shirt

Aldous Huxley “Facts” Quote T-Shirt

George Monbiot T-Shirt

Mark Twain “Schooling” Quote T-Shirt

Domestic Extremist: Last Chirstmas Order Dates and New T-Shirts

Keep Calm And Carry On; New T-Shirts Out Now

“I’m ‘Avin’ Hoops” – New T-Shirts and 3-for-2 Sale on all RedMolotov T-Shirt Designs

Some People Never Go Crazy…

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